Today's assignment is to take yourself to a place you've never gone before alone. Go for a solitary walk in the park or around a local lake. Visit the mall alone or out to eat at your favorite restaurant. WHY?
Most victims of abuse or those with horrible pasts hate being alone and they bury themselves with company and activities that keep them in the midst of people to hide from themselves. Learn to love you again and value your own company. Being alone isn't a bad thing. And guess what? You aren't a horrible person. There's some good in there for you to reflect upon.